Monthly Archives: April 2010

What Day Is It?

My exact words, What day is it? I have had a rough 48 hours and do not remember much, only what Dan has told me. It has been, back to back seizures and bad sugar lows, making the time during and in between just plain miserable. Last night was so bad, that I was unable to walk and breathe……causing me at one point to panic, in my panic I kicked Dan in the chin, (he said he thought I fractured his chin and a day later is still in pain at the touch). I have finally been able to make sense of the day and been able to blog (put words together and make complete sentences – has been pain has been really bad). I know things are bad when we did not go down to Dan’s parents……We have not missed a week in a year. I am so sore and just dragging. I look at Dan, and he just smiles as always, but I know he is exhausted and sore too, it is written all over his face. Hopefully, tonite we will be able to get a good nites sleep and have a fresh start for tomorrow. I know Dan has not blogged in a couple of days….since he has not left my side…taking care of me. He is such good husband, I would be lost without him.

Bad Night…But Wish Answered

Had a really bad night and happened so fast, Dan could not stop it. I woke this morning sleeping on the couch with Dan all bundled up in blankets and with clothes I did not put on (Dan got an A this time – he coordinated my outfit-he did a great job). My head and stomach were killing me this morning – everything hurt even my eyelashes. But it was beautiful out and I was not going to miss another great day. Got ready, ran around with Dan, spoke to my mother (she seemed weird on the phone and just before I hung up with her she said I am coming to New Jersey for Christmas – I’ll talk to you later. I was so happy my wish came true). Then I went to get the mail and there was a card from my sister Kathleen (my middle sister – 44 years old, living with her boyfriend/Marcos – great guy). I opened the card….it was a mother’s day card entitled to My Aunt. I was puzzled- since she is terrible at sending cards….then I read it and started to cry ….It was a card from my future nieces/nephews that are expecting to arrive in October…..She is having twins….I am so happy for her….they had been trying and started to give up…..Her wish had finally been aswered. It was wonderful news and gives me something to look forward too. I have two beautiful nieces
Maya and Bella, my sister Erika’s daughters (the baby sister) now and love them so much……I am looking forward to spoiling two more. I am so happy. My mother is so excited to…..Dan’s daughter Jenny (wants to a be a pediatric nurse was so happy too and was asking so many questions).

This news helped me forget the aches and pain for a little while and then made me wonder…I wondered what Dan and my child would have looked like, would it have been a girl or boy,….made me sad, but I have the opportunity to share my nieces (and or nephews) and that is perfectly fine….I have Dan and that is all I need. He is so good to me and I love him so much.

Dans Moms 85th Birthday

Today is Mom’s 85th Birthday, going down to South Jersey to spend the day with her, do errands and then take the (mom and dad) to dinner. I know Dan hates Wednesday/Thursdays because he knows how I hate going every week, and that he has no other choice but to take me. I wish he could go by himself, and I stay home, so he could spend quality time with them and not worry if I am upset or not…..but he won’t leave me. I tried to be quite and not express my upsetment…. Let him spend the whole time with her and putting the puzzle (they do puzzles) together. I was good.
Anyway got thru the day, until next week and it starts all over again…..planting, cleaning, shopping etc. He is a good son, just wish she knew how lucky she is to have him (sometimes not very nice….old makes me mad). Anyway I love him more than life and hope he knows it.

Missed A Few Days

Just filling in the events of Sunday. I got off to a rough start, did not a good night sleep that was hoped for, so I dragged most of the morning. I sat an Open House with Dan and was in miserable pain thru most of it. But had something to look forward to afterwards. Dan and I met my sister Kathleen and her boyfriend Marcos for Italian food. It was great to see them, I don’t get to see her very much, so it was exciting and fun. We had a great time, talked and laughed alot. I miss my family, it is hard especially when my parents moved to New Mexico….things just came apart. So I take any time I can spend with my sisters and nieces very special….just need to get them all together…that is going to take alot of hard work and timing….Anyway it was really nice and I was very thankful to Dan for taking me. Of course my stomach put a damper on the good time was sick to my stomach after the meal, nothing unusual. But was a nice end to the weekend or a good beginning to the week to come

It’s A New Day

Woke this morning with a slamming headache, the side effects of the last two bad sugar lows from last night. I am so sore and tired, I am in slow motion, which I don’t get, since last night I only got up 5-7 times; I guess it is a combination of everything. It is beautiful out and I have alot to get done today… I must push myself twice as hard, inorder to feel like I have accomplished something. We just got off the phone with Dan’s mom, his father is the same/status quo, which is a good thing. Maybe the day will get better, can hope.

Why Do I Do This Everyday?

Can someone give me one good reason? Because I can tell you there isn’t one. I feel terrible and it is not getting any better. I have popped so many ibuprofen gel caps that are suppose to take the headache away and be safe on my stomach, well it is not working. I am so done for the day…. ( at at this point I’m just feeling DONE! I’m at the point of saying please I don’t want to do this anymore)I tried being positive and working it out.Dragged all day…..but nothing is working with me….. Had 2 more bad spells in the day that Dan caught before they got even worse. I can’t wait for this day to end, and if it is going to continue into tomorrow….don’t bother….(I am having a prolonged melt-down).Well, we cancelled going down to Dan’s parents because of “Meet the Candidates Night ….but it doen’t look like it is going to happen as planned (when does anything these days)…Dan spoke to his mom a little while ago and his Dad does not seem to be doing so good…..might be making a early run late,late night/early morning run…..I hope it does not turn out that way…..but you know Dan… always come first (before his wants or needs). I am keeping my fingers crossed and hope my situation does not add anymore drama as it has been doing. Dan needs a break as well as I do. Can only hope for a good night (as good as good is) sleep.

Just Keeps Getting Worse

I hoped that as the yesterday went by the day would get better….So much for wishful thinking. Well in the last 48 hours I remember, may if I am lucky qabout 9-10 hours without being reminded what I did by Dan. Again I had another very bad sugar low, this time it started when I was out in public, but Dan, my angel got out of where were before I made a seen. He is so sweet, he bought dinner susshi from Nagoya (our favorite place)….the bad thing is I don’t remember eating any of it…..that really stinks….Woke up this morning feeling 50 times worse than yesterday…..God I wish I could send my head and stomach out for repair…I dragging big time…..A turtle moves quicker than me at this present time. I deon’t think I am going to make it to office meeting with Dan…Probably better I don’t go, would be miserable and not comprehend much….I gotta get better, Dan has big meeting tonite and I have to be at my best.

Dans Dad

Well it is a Sunny Sunday, woke up feeling terrible again. (I just wish one day, things could be different…..I feel like a broken record)Anyway…I hope we can get out and enjoy the weather. Dan just got off the phone with his Mother, he is not saying much, but he has that look of worry on his face….his mom said the father is not feeling so great and has lost more weight….(over the past couple of weeks he has been losing alot of weight – not a good sign). It is very sad…hopefully we can get out and do something (Hope I feel better – don’t want to tell him how bad I really feel….he has enough on his mind)…..Some fresh air and a brisk walk – maybe that will help, I don’t know what else to do. If he needs to be back in hospital it means we need to drive her back and forth to be with him all day….I wish they lived closer so we could be able to do more for them. Dan is trying to talk them in to moving to Mahwah. They say when one of them goes then the other will move up by us but till then they are fine in their home. This week is a busy week for Dan and I between real estate, the campaign, doctors appts in the city….and his dads poor health I hope I don’t have many health issues this week to add to the problem! Keeping fingers crossed.


Well, I can tell it is going to be one of those days…..Woke this morning with a slamming headache and my stomach and joints ache terribly. Dan said I had a bad sugar low/not a seizure (one good thing). So of course I am dragging/ and have no memory of the event. I finally got dress and am ready to go (seemed to take forever-but better late than never). I hope the day gets better and my aches lessen….One thing I know, Dan will make the day exciting and make me laugh… he always does…..I love him so much and am a lucky girl to have him…..Well, I am off.

Good & Bad

Absolutely a beautiful day…..Sat outside and got sun at Dan’s parents house, while Dan worked on the outside (yard work. I was absolutely miserable the whole time there…..felt so sick, just wanted to be home and in bed. I felt bad being so quiet and not socialable….but all wanted was to be home, felt really sick. I wish he could go by himself and spend quality time with them….I feel bad that he has to worry about me or I make his time horrible. So happy to be home and looking forward to going to bed….Hope I can get a good night sleep……Have to get up early tomorrow….alot to do.