Daily Archives: April 7, 2011

Bitter Sweet

Today is a Bitter Sweet Day, I received a box in the mail today. It was a package with my Insulin pump, I was so happy – all the hard work Dan had done finally arrived, but then a feeling of fear and saddness over came me. The fear of how we were going to pay for the supplies to run it set in. (I told Dan-to forget it at the beginning – I would just take my chances everyday / we are so behind in our bills as it is – we can’t afford it…..he would not hear of it – he said the the key element the “Sensor” will have to come later because the insurance company does not pay for it = which is so stupid it/ it is the most important part – the main piece to the puzzle it will prevent or warn me if I am going to have a seizure and it is not covered and is something we can not afford……..kind of worthless to have a pump and no sensor. It broke my heart to see the look on Dan’s face when I asked him how he were going to pay for it and he said he was working on it and we had to wait for the sensor. So our happy moment was short lived, it seems like nothing is lasting – it just is never meant to be. But I thing only thing I know is definite is the love between the two of us…….the only thing I know we can count on. I wish there was something I could do make things easier and better…..Instead all I can say is “Thank you baby and I love you and I am so grateful for all that you do and try to accomplish to make my life easier and good.”